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Saturday, July 3, 2010

I Hated Love Stories - A fugly film

I am much calmer now. I lost my balance (of kind) in the first precise 3 minutes of the film reeling.

If I have to describe this joke of a film, it would be ‘characterless’. It felt that the filmmakers got up every morning, decided the script for that day without a shower and set out to shoot. So much so that the film now reeks of narcissism. A mish-mash-mush of his own, and Yash Chopra’s, Farhan Akhtar’s erstwhile pink-red films, this unbearably hackneyed plot is a shocking revelation of Kjo’s low IQ on good stories.

What the film shows - Guy doesn’t believe in love, sees girl  likes her, girl is almost engaged to someone else, guy flirts with her, she falls for him, he is confused, she is heartbroken, decides to get married to the original fiancee, he realises overnight he loves her, rushes to tell her, she is now confused, decides to turn down her fiancee and finally the 2 meet. I think except in Kuch Kuch Hota Hai, Kal Ho Na Ho, Hum Tum, Mere Yaar ki Shaadi Hai, Dil Chahta Hai, Dilwale Dulhaniya, Dil to Pagal Hai and just a few hundred dozen other films, we haven’t seen a story so enchanting elsewhere. And of course, the yummy mummy who rescues the adult sonny from dopes of depression with an emoshioanlly touching ‘go-get-her’ filibuster. How original. Maybe he wanted to take a take at the typical love stories. Instead he ended up taking a take on himself?

Ok, here’s another hilarious touch to the film. The radio ka love guru’s continuous references to ‘sex’ as a solution for love. Funny na. No, ‘fugly’ na? Of course, sex is a 3 lettered word which gets children in giggles, so since we are 6 year old’s chewing popcorn watching the ‘con’, this is bound to be mightily funny for us. Please do not forget to laugh for courtesy’ sake..they have researched day and night on that one with the youth of India. Ah ah and the part where homosexual humour is used as a punch. I think everyone except KJo were straight….- faced then. That’s because he won’t have any face left na after the film bombs na. What? No…I didn’t mean that…tch. Though what is his obsession with SRK? He turned a charming Sameer Soni into a proxy Khan.

No complaints about the actors. They managed to make a copy paste film seem different.

The other good thing about the film is it works as a good food guide – with so many parties and watering holes and eating joints being thrown at our face. Enough to send Jughead in a tizzy.

Dialogues - Dev Anand’s film score more.

Music – appealing some places.

Direction – you cannot Cover your Ass by directing a bad script

In a nutshell this film can contest with RGV’s Aag or Mayawati’s bra-g to tell the junta –‘jaag’. We ‘hated’ his love story as much as Johar Jr hates good scripts. And then his unit makes a clown of itself. A bad clown which make people frown. Then when the box office crowns thorns, they will pout like a lunatic mahout. That wasn’t a joke now. Makes no sense? Exactly. You got the point.

PS: Didn’t i tell you? Of course, the girl’s name in the film is Simran.

Score: Negative.


  1. Hi,

    Even I hated this one. And cribbed royally on my blog. By the way "word Jockey" is a cool name. Damn! Why didn't I think of that before?

    (from the mashable meet up, remember?)

  2. heyy thats not fair...ok i agree its not the best of movies...but its "supposed" to be a spoof on KJOs own its ok.....and the songs are awesome!! u didnt even mention that....i think this is more of ur own expectations belittling the movie than an objective review......

    i would give it 2.5/3 out of 5....which is to say its average...timpass one-time watch.....some of the spoofs like the "vagera vagera" and the "sadka kiya" kjo scenes were a neat touch....

    on the bad side......well u mentioned them already :)

  3. hey mo, u know, after all that hogwash of stereotypes, i didnt want to see that all-in-one hogwash again and waste my time...its like an author writing different books on the same topic and another book summing up the same shit of all his. and boss, I am spending a lot of money, so he better give me some sense to watch. if he wants to create spoofs, he needs to get more creative than this. period. songs...what songs? i didnt go to see songs in there, i might as well buy the cd and listen to them. its a movie review, i dont care about the music if the film is crass ya. and honestly mo, the only time i could pass was the first 3 minutes.. the other so called comical inputs were like needles in haystacks...u had to look for them hard and try to laugh. i mean, honest but this was one film which pretty pissed me off. really made me angry. angry.

  4. i am definitely not watching it :)


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